I'm a work in progress...

I have recently been more and more bothered with the fact that I do not know how to fix anything. I have recently had a deep-seated desire to be handy. I often get these spurts where I want to better myself. They typically pass pretty quickly.

My father knows how to fix everything. When I was little I felt I was the same way, like when you blow into the Nintendo game cartridge to get it to work with the original Nintendo system –stupid dust.

I now find myself budgeting for things to be repaired by someone who professionally repairs things, simply because I’d rather not try. For instance, the second row of seats in my Jeep fold-down to make more storage room. Recently, (and when I say recently, I mean about 4 months ago) the middle seat got stuck somehow and will not return to its regular upright position. There is not a lever associated with returning it to the regular upright position. You simply lift the seat up until it locks into place.

For the past four months the middle-row middle-seat has been stuck, folded down. I like to think of it as a new arm rest for my passangers, as opposed to a broken middle row seat. A friend recently asked if I ever plan on fixing it. I don’t personally… but I guess I should dig into the “fix broken shit” fund and take it to the dealership. Or since said fund is also tied to the “go out and have a good time” fund… maybe I should hit up my father to see if he could help me… and by help me, I mean fix it while I stand there and watch.

I am definitely a work in progress...

Still Kickin' ...

I promise I am still here and kickin' ...

It's been quite a while since I've blogged. I promise to change that.

Until I have something to rant or laugh about, and *ALSO* have the time to put it writing, I hope you find laughter in this: Sh*t My Dad Says

See ya soon!

The Vicious Circle

I have been traveling entirely too much lately. I have only been home one weekend this month. And I have plans to travel this weekend and next. I haven’t worked a full 5-day week in a long time, which makes me so giddy I might pee myself. All of this traveling has been by choice, except for one work-related trip last weekend. This being said, I have come to the conclusion that my social life is ruining my progress and livelihood. Ultimately, I would like to own my own dwelling, as a few of my more accomplished friends have done. I understand how paying rent for my Uptown apartment is viewed as wasteful and I, for the most part, concur. Although I have no desire to do yard work, play handy-man, or live in the ‘burbs, it would be nice to have a yard where my dog could run and play without being on a leash attached to my hand.

I really need to focus on putting more in savings. This is a problem I have struggled with in the past. At the rate we are spiraling out of control as a country, the social security program will not benefit me in any way. I will have to retire one day and will eventually depend on someone to wipe my ass and care for me (probably in an old-folks home), especially since I have no desire to have my own children [side note: why is it so abnormal not to want kids? People treat you like there is something wrong with you when you make that statement. There are tons of people who have had kids that definitely shouldn’t have… ahhh if only more people had my train of though. I digress]. It’s time to re-evaluate my mid-twenties lifestyle.

I always seem find a reason to spend the money I should be saving. For instance, the last transactions from my bank account include: iPhone 3GS, car charger for said iPhone, lawyer fees for my speeding ticket, gas and spending money for different trips taken this month, purchases on half.com/eBay, lunch/dinner with friends, bars, etc. Some of the things I spend my money on are borderline ridiculous.

After mulling over my expenses on an all-too-convenient report from my bank (thanks, Wells Fargo), I have realized that the restaurant / bar / travel columns out-weigh every other column ten-fold. Based on my spending report if I were a boring person I would have much more money in the bank. This leaves me with the question: I wonder if it is better to enjoy life as you go, or do without in your younger years so that you can save for the future.

I am certain I am not the first person to spend money on wasteful things, nor will I be the last. I have recently off-set some of these ridiculous purchases by selling some of my other ridiculous purchases on eBay. I am also forming a resolution to say “No” to weekend trips and expensive outings that will most likely be forgotten and/or end up a hazy insignificant memory, due to extensive beer-therapy … right after my Vegas trip in September…. and quite possibly a long weekend get-away for Labor Day. Haha.

My poor spending habits are a vicious circle…

Breaking up is hard to do...

So I finally broke down this week and bought a new iPhone 3GS. With such a cheap price tag, they make it hard not to join the Apple Cult. The awkward part came when I had to call Sprint Customer Service to inform them I would be cancelling my service once my contract was up in a few days. I had to endure a 15 minute phone call “breaking up” with the Sprint Lady on the phone. I was uncomfortable as she made suggestions on how to fix our ill-fated agreement (relationship, if you will). She suggested I try out the new Palm Pre and went on to ask “what does AT&T offer that we don’t.” By the end of the conversation I felt like I just dumped a clingy ex-girlfriend after a 9 year relationship. She really laid it on thick and made me feel like such a dick. I quickly forgot all about Sprint as I synced all 365 contacts from my old Palm Treo to the sleek, new iPhone, and downloaded a crap-load of awesome applications ::::high-five:::: It’s hard to deny that Apple’s product line is simply the best around. I am certain Steve Jobs could quite possibly take over the world one day.

Moving on, I did as I said in my last post. When I got back from Puerto Vallarta, I became a proud puppy-owner. Her name is Grace. I got her at the end of May. So far, things have been going really well. She is four months old now and she is really smart. I’m scared I will become one of those dog people that spend way too much time with their animals and find someway to relate any conversation to the dog. It’s kind of sad, but I can see it happening a little. It reminds me of those overly proud parents who show pictures of their ugly newborn rug rats every chance they get. With that being said, here is a picture of my pup...

(All-together-now: AWWWWE).

She’s borderline amazing! Since I’ve had Grace, I have met a ton of people that live in my building. They all gather at the dog park around 9-10pm to let their dogs play before bedtime. I call them the dog-park-mafia. So far I have transitioned well. I will keep you updated.

I am pumped about this weekend. Phil and I are headed down to Lake Travis for the weekend. A bunch of us are staying at Jeff’s Lake House to celebrate the 4th. If it’s anything like Jeff’s Bachelor Party there last year, it should be a blast!

Until next time…

Elevator Shananigans

Getting on the elevator in my building, heading up to my apartment, there was a very attractive Spanish girl and (what I assume to be) her mother. They are speaking Spanish to each other and then the girl looks at me with her beautiful eyes and says, “You look like a UFC fighter,” which my reply was “hmm, I’ve never heard that one before…” Annnd enter awkward moment. Now, let me explain; people tell me fairly often that I look like their “really good friend” or someone else they know. Or people comment on my size and how “I must’ve played football.” I feel like I must have the most familiar face possible, although I do not know anyone that I think looks like me. The girl in the elevator goes on to explain a particular UFC fighter. I just assumed that she meant in general…no, she told me I looked like Brock Lesnar. As soon as I got into my apartment I woke up my Mac and Google’d this fellow to find –what I assumed would be a big, attractive beast-of-a-man – unfortunately, what I found was ‘roid-raging, gorilla-of-a-man. . I do not think we look anything alike. ANYTHING. Maybe it’s just me, but I am slightly offended that my elevator companion compared me to this guy. The only thing worse that this is when a girl told me that when I smile really big, I look like Will Sasso from MadTV. Yea, the fat guy. Thanks a lot. So now I am trying not to look like a ‘roided out gorilla who smiles too big because I’d hate to see what that will get me. I wonder if there is a support group for something like this?

Moving on. I leave for PV tomorrow, which is really exciting. Is it just me or does everyone have a tiny little heart attack when traveling concerns a passport? I can pack my passport in a very safe spot, or slip it in my front pocket, but I will still check several times to make sure it is still safe in my belongings. I am not sure if this is an OCD thing or I am just losing it. I pulled my passport out earlier this week and sat it on my night stand, where I was sure to see it every day. There is no way I am forgetting it. I will pack tonight and put it in my bag and will end up checking to make sure its there every 20 minutes until I am in the air. Man, I cannot wait to be in Mexico.

In other news, I am getting a dog upon my return to the States. I haven’t decided on a name. just yet, but I am excited about it. It is not very common to see me get excited about added responsibility, but after thinking about it for a while, I feel like the gain of having a dog outweighs all the crap that goes along with it. I’ll try to post a picture after I pick her up.

That’s all for now.

"We're all going to die!!"

I am so tired of hearing about the Swing Flu (not to mention the ‘when pigs fly’ puns). Although I do have a vacation riding on this thing, I am getting sick of seeing pictures in the paper of people walking around in masks. I am supposed to leave for Puerto Vallarta in exactly 18 days. I’ve read online that no reports of Swine Flu have been reported in Jalisco (the state we will be in), nor in neighboring states. I am not worried. I know everyone is freaked out about it, but as long as you have decent hygiene and are a generally healthy person with a normal immune system, you will live to fight another day…

I actually read the other day online that this is just a government conspiracy to keep people at home so they will spend their money here, as opposed to the Mexican vacation spots. Give me a break. If you honestly believe this I hope you get swine flu. Wouldn’t that just be a big slap in the face?

Another “doosie” that I've heard recently is that Al-Qaeda is responsible, and this is a terroristic attack. Yeah, I am sure the plan of attack goes something like this: A – Hijack US planes and fly them into buildings and kill thousands. B – Spread flu to make people feel like crap, but we’ll start the whole thing in Mexico. That will throw the dumb Americans off of our trail. Hah. Seriously people, if we were going to be attacked, don’t you think they would be targeting the US with a more deadly chemical or virus?

Now with all of this being said … watch me go on vacation regardless of the opinion of the CDC and become infected. Should I become tremendously ill and die, please someone hack into my BlogSpot and delete this message, because no one likes the “I told you so conversation!”

"My Couch Pulls Out..."

This year already seems to be flying by. It’s mid-April. I am going to College Station this afternoon, when I leave work. I am definitely looking forward to it, especially if it is even half the fun we all had last year.

So I went to get my hair cut yesterday in West Village and I had the same lady cut it as last time. Being the polite person that I am, I asked her how her week had been going. The rest of the time I was there she explained in detail how her week was un-folding, including the pain status of her kidney infection, which subsequently caused her to miss two days of work. Don’t worry, she got antibiotics and they seem to be doing the trick. My point to this one is: I guess I got what I was asking for, but normal people just give you a “glass half empty / glass half full” summation of the week. I think it is weird how some people share a lot of information with people they barely know. Like for instance, when I was in high school, I managed a dry cleaners and people would come in and tell us all sorts of gruesome details regarding their lives. Note to self: don’t be that guy.

Today I was reading a news article about a Twitter-War between Ashton Kutcher and CNN – to see who could reach 1 million Twitter Followers first. WTF?!? That is actually news in our country? Seriously, people… who gives a shit? Crappy News Network and the guy from Punk’d are tweeting. You can file that under stuff I will never lose sleep over.

I got Amanda and I tickets to go see Louis C.K. at Lakewood Theater in about 3-weeks. If you have never heard of him, definitely check him out on YouTube. Louis C.K. is an Emmy Award-winning stand-up comedian, writer, actor, producer and director, guaranteed to make you laugh.

I leave in exactly 5 weeks for Puerto Vallarta for Memorial Day weekend. There are about 10 of us headed down for a long weekend to stay at Adam Miller’s place. I know I just got back from Mexico, but this trip is too good not to pass up. We’d all been talking about it for a while, and you just can’t beat it! I figure, this will be my third trip to Mexico since the beginning of 2009. I am probably going to get harassed for frequent travel to the country. I swear I am not smuggling drugs. I am going to miss the Byron Nelson Classic this year because of this trip. That’s a bummer, but I am ready for a little fun in the sun.

We came in fifth place at Pluckers Trivia this week. I do believe we had the best team name though: "My Couch Pulls Out, But I Don't" (aweful, I know...)